Make Your Own Frock

Forget Kate Middleton’s wedding dress which she *ahem* allegedly designed herself. Why not make your own fancy frock? You could wear it on April 29 and remember that you’re not going to be criticised for everything you wear for the rest of your life, have your phone tapped by News of the World, nor are you marrying a soon-to-be-baldy.

You might not be becoming a Princess, but cheer up love. Making a dress like one of these might ease the pain. And chances are, you’ll have some, if not all of these materials at home!

Balloon Dress

Make sure you’re not in a room with someone who has a latex allergy. Otherwise, you’re good to go.

Flower Dress

Raid your neighbours’ gardens! Not advisable during Spring. Stock up on anti-histimines. Look out for bees and carry anaphalactic shock epi-pens. Otherwise – enjoy!

Chocolate Dress

Watch those calories and for heavens’ sake, look out for nuts. And be wary of children. Those little bastards will ensure you’re desperately seeking the pumpkin coach after 10 mins. Make sure there are none attached to your gusset when you make a hasty, melty, chocolatey exit.

Vego Dress

If there was ever a use for cabbage, this is it. I can’t think of any other good way to use that horrific vegetable.

Aluminium Foil Dress

That Bling? Am I right? Luxe to Less in less than 40m. Just don’t try to sneak up on anyone. And don’t stand next to any electrical sockets.

Toilet Roll Dress

Ok, we’re at the bottom of the barrel now, aren’t we? But still, LOOK at what you can achieve when you put your mind to it. Seriously. On those Hen’s nights you were a bit drunk and it was hilarious, but if you stayed away from the cheap champers and made some goddamn effort, see what you can do.

About ohhellwhatthehell

I like gin, mittens and otters, not necessarily in that order. Here's some stuff I felt like writing down when I'm not chained to a desk writing other things for a living. Please use caution when using this site; there may be sweary words, cute animals and general bullshit. Don't say I didn't fucking warn you.
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