So what’s happened this week? Megan Fox is racist, Posh STILL hasn’t given birth and Amy Winehouse got wasted and fucked up another concert. Same old, same old.
In other news, technology is soon to help out us patient, right thinking, clothes wearing and buying ladies, rather than just perverts and nerd-wanking hackers. Yes, that’s right. Soon we will have software or robots or something that will make buying clothes online a cinch. If you’re not a perfect size whatever, then rejoice and hark unto me. Clever people are making things with computers that will match you perfectly with the fantastible world of online shopping. There will be cameras that can measure your dimensions and match you with outfits. There will be ways in which you can superimpose outfits on yourself and see how they look.
They are already in production. They will remove that sinking feeling you get which is 10 times worse than when you pick something off the rack and try it on and it looks hideous. Because it’s worse knowing you have to exchange it by posting it and using paypal and shit. Finally, something we can use! One can only hope they will eliminate my desperate attempts to wear gypsy tops and allow me to wear colours other than black, which yes, makes you thinner, but if you are me, invariably is covered in cat fur which you do not notice until you are standing in the daylight doign something very important and business like.
We have money to spend. For the love of god make things easier on us. Give us fashion robot-software-computer-things and let us have them NOW. That is all.