Wake up and Get Warm, Australia


It was so fucking cold last night I got up at 4am and put my Ugg boots on and bloody well slept in them. Yes, I did that. This is a thing. For realsies.

While my Australian workmates were slightly horrified, I merely said the words “this country has no central heating and I live on the ground floor with little insulation around the doors and also have no reverse-cycle air-con”. That shut them the hell up.

Seriously, try sleeping in minus degrees with No Heat What So Ever. SOmetimes this country really disappoints me. There’s been a number of deaths caused by people who don’t have heating trying to warm themselves by doing daft things like turning on the hairdryer and leaving it in the bed. I thought that was mental until last night.

I’m considering a patent for an Ugg suit. Or buying an electric blanket even though my mother put the fear of god into me about being electrocuted or being set on fire by one, a bit like the way she wouldn’t let me lock the bathroom door – and still doesn’t – when I have a bath in case I drown. She may have a point. I’m layering up.

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About ohhellwhatthehell

I like gin, mittens and otters, not necessarily in that order. Here's some stuff I felt like writing down when I'm not chained to a desk writing other things for a living. Please use caution when using this site; there may be sweary words, cute animals and general bullshit. Don't say I didn't fucking warn you.
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