Texts From Last Night/Today with Friends


H: For some reason I’ve got dick head written on my hand. Was I maybe being a bit drunk and annoying

Me: Does this happen to you often? Have you checked your other body parts for insults?

H: Now I’m worried

Me: Well I didn’t wake up with mouthy bitch written on me anywhere which was a relief.

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About ohhellwhatthehell

I like gin, mittens and otters, not necessarily in that order. Here's some stuff I felt like writing down when I'm not chained to a desk writing other things for a living. Please use caution when using this site; there may be sweary words, cute animals and general bullshit. Don't say I didn't fucking warn you.
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