My Wizened 35-year-old Ass


In honour of my 35th birthday (which is today, thank you very much) I thought I’d post an article from Jezebel which references a DM story about the rules of what women should and should not wear ever.

http://jezebel.com/your-wizened-35-year-old-crone-ass-is-unfit-for-crop-to-686875688

Specifically, I am no longer allowed to wear a crop top, because if you do that after 34 the world will implode. Not that I’ve ever actually worn one, but now I’m all shades of sad because I’ve clearly missed my window of opportunity and will never be able to fulfill my life-long dream of exposing my midriff in public in somewhere other than the beach.

I’d also probably better get a wriggle on because appaz I’ve only got a few years to wear a bikini, leggings and to wear my hair long. Zip zip zip.

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About ohhellwhatthehell

I like gin, mittens and otters, not necessarily in that order. Here's some stuff I felt like writing down when I'm not chained to a desk writing other things for a living. Please use caution when using this site; there may be sweary words, cute animals and general bullshit. Don't say I didn't fucking warn you.
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One Response to My Wizened 35-year-old Ass

  1. kate says:

    The weirdest thing in that whole article is the idea that women over 41 shouldn’t wear stilettos. Um, what? Um, why? Um, fuck you.

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